From the bulletin for the Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time (Feb 23, 2025)
Parish School of Prayer, Pt 15: Prayer for the Dead and Dying
“We are on this earth,” said St. Alphonsus, “to give glory to God, and to die.” The second is a guarantee. Holy souls, however, do both when they do either. During life, they give glory to God as they die to themselves. In death, they likewise glorify God as they depart for true life. As the Psalm says, “O, how precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints!” (Ps 116:15).
Mother Church knows this. Mindful of how momentous our passage into eternity is, she drapes Christian death with an abundance of prayer. I don’t think any other moment of human existence has so many associated liturgies. Consider: The ritual for Pastoral Care of the Sick contains not only the “last rites” (including Penance, the Apostolic Pardon, Anointing of the Sick, and Holy Viaticum), but also prayers of commendation of the dying and a liturgy of the word for immediately after a person has died. The Order of Christian Funerals contains another complex of rites: a brief liturgy “in the presence of the body” for when the family first gathers around the deceased, a vigil liturgy for the wake, prayers for when the body is transferred to the Church, the funeral liturgy itself, and, finally, the Rite of Committal at the graveside. Then there is the Office of the Dead, in which the Liturgy of the Hours is offered for the departed, and a variety of Memorial Masses in the missal (containing Mass prayers for when news of the death arrives, the anniversary, etc.). Lastly, there are all the devotional prayers, such at the Rosary, by which the faithful have traditionally accompanied the dying and remembered the dead.
Talk about a prayerful sendoff! As the texts of these prayers reveal, the aim of all this is manifold: to obtain grace and strength for a person in his or her last agony, to beseech mercy and pardon for the dying/deceased, to speed his or her soul’s entrance into Paradise, to provide comfort to those who mourn, to praise Christ for His work of transforming death into a passage to life, to invoke the intercession of the saints, and, more generally, to invite the light and grace of God into the darkness of death.
Sadly, these prayers which the Church lavishes on death often go unsaid. As the bluegrass classic has it, “I heard the crash on the highway, but I didn’t hear nobody pray.” Death has fallen victim to secularization and superficiality. Not long ago, it would not be uncommon for someone to die in the home surrounded by the family, who had kept prayer vigil (with blessed candle lit!) on their knees during the last agony and called the parish priest for the last rites; then, before three days have passed: the wake (also, perhaps, in the home), the procession to the nearby church, the funeral, and then the solemn procession to the cemetery before the closing luncheon. Daily life–traffic included–came to a sudden halt for death, a stark reminder to the living. Nowadays, we have minimized the inconvenience of our loved one’s passing. Death at the hospital. Smartphone scrolling around the deathbed, as narcotics take the place of prayer for the dying. Day-of visitation in lieu of wake, if there is a “celebration” at church at all, and this perhaps weeks after the death, to accommodate family schedules. No last farewell needed if the ashes remain on the mantle. “O death, where is your sting?” We have removed it by our spiritual stinginess, while the dead go to their judgment poorly clad for lack of prayers.
This past month, however, I had the privilege of assisting at a very “precious” death. Last rites were requested in the care facility. The death occurred minutes before a scheduled Mass at the same, and so a rosary was offered with the residents before a memorial Mass for a newly departed soul. A priest was requested to lead a prayer service at the wake, which was followed by a family rosary. Funeral Mass in the church the next day. And after the luncheon, a slow, old-fashioned procession (perhaps 30 cars deep!) to the cemetery for a graveside service in the freezing cold. Humble people, many of them none-too-practicing. But through the prayers of Mother Church, they opened wide a window of grace for their family and sped the soul of their (great-(grand))mother on to her heavenly reward.
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